I must be too annoying 4 u.
i dont nkow, theres a guy slesping next to me and im wearing 8 tsthirts? wtf happened last night? will you come get me.
i think im in thre room next to you
I'm gonna write a book, Things that go bump in the night: The story of Katelyn. Chapter one, my roommate is a dumb whore.
marching band practice is quite the interesting soundtrack to sex
He has that cheese in a can and he's eating it. I have never seen that outside a goofy movie.
when i spit it made a heart shape. i think it's a sign
We're about to have a bottle rocket fight on jetskis. You have 5 minutes to get on our level.
Going to the market. I need some nachos and a serious re-evalution of my life.
He kept checkin to make sure you were still alive after you passed out on his bed, After like the 4th time he walked back in there you were naked on his bed eating an apple, claiming he needed to be the Adam to your Eve..That drunk..
I HAVEN'T FUCKED ANYONE IN FOREVER AND A HALF I DON'T DESERVE TO BE A TRASHY BLONDE
You now have the mental image of me flying off into the sunset with no pants
I literally can not watch Thor without thinking of your dick
I think the only option is to smoke so much weed I just pass out for 3 days.
Whiskey. Because sometimes it's fun to have your hands go numb.
Ever get that feeling that you're the back up booty call and half way through securing the fake date excuse to try to get in your pants, the guy hears back from the original booty call and drops the conversation with no explanation?
Randomize
