I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
i don't plan on having that self control this summer
your suggestions for charades were, getting sucked into an aircraft turbine, getting raped by a dolphin, and having sex with a vacuum cleaner. you got your own, and actually used a vacuum cleaner as a prop.
we just did breakfast shots, I have a black eye and savage garden is on . Best weekend ever
i feel like i was in a swimming pool of captain and coke and had to drink my way out
There is ecstasy everywhere. Get over here right no5w. The 5 is silent.
I drank entirely too much. My skin hurts to wear
$200 on plane. $110 on train. $5 per drink on plane. $15 per case on train. Plane 1 hour flight. Train 9 hour excursion. Hmmmmm.
You bought champagne and told everyone it was because I'd just found out I was pregnant. How exactly is that being a good wingman?
Would it be weird to tell him that on his b'day he's dressing up and we're having weird Jesus sex?
Why is my hat full of peanuts?
Don't throw them out, I'm on my way
Learn from me. Do not smoke cigs and fold laundry in your room. The cigarette will fall into the dresser without you noticing and your shirts will be on fire. Wanna go shopping tomorrow? I need some new shirts.
How do you ask the man who gives you multiple orgasms if he has friends who could do the same for your friend?
you do realize the next step is naked mud wrestling, right?
He was a foot taller than me and my hands were bigger than his, it's called Pity head
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