I got date raped at Sigma Chi last night!
Dude, you never made it to Chi last night. You fell into a tree and passed out.
he took off his pants and apologized in advance if I thought he was too small.
Sober January is a disaster.
the girl in my class has a rolling backpack and just told it to stay. im too hungover for this.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just painted my nails at the bar... I may be getting too comfortable here.
Also there's a dick sized hole in my tights...should I be worried?
We found a swing set....it's in the front yard.
I woke up in my living room, on the floor, wearing nothing but a fur coat?
One of the guys I danced with wanted to give me his number so I convinced him I had a photographic memory and that I would remember it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I saw this news story about two naked Satanists being arrested so I thought I should ask if you need bail money or pants
SO EXCITED ABOUT STRING CHEESE RIGHT NOW
I made out with the hosts' boyfriend, infront of her, drank way too much, slept in my car and convinced everyone that I'm really a nice person. If that's not skilled lying, I don't know what is.
I'm in the recliner and i have a bottle of wine wedged in my cleavage, drinking from a straw. Clever and classy or pathetic and sloppy?
I was watchin a porno and I sware I saw that dude at the bar at applebees the other night
Just found a handle of Tito's in my TV stand
Can't recall when I put that there, but let's goooo
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