Bel-fucking-mar, this place has more popped collars than a Hollister catalog
We were tigers and tigers don't wear pants
Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
He wouldn't know what to do with his penis even if they made a "how to get a blowjob for dummies" guide
I caught a rooster roaming Edison Park then released it in the bar. They made me try to catch it again and somebody played the chicken dance while I chased it
We left an ass print on the piano.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to concentrate on legal issues with the ghost of his giant penis in me?
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
What has two arms, one testicle and no credit card debt? This guy.
So I just did the math and everything in this room except the computer and my clothes has been in my vagina
It might've been him telling me last night that he "doesn't even need beer goggles to fuck me." When I thought that was sweet, I realized something needed to change.
Smoking a bowl and ordering Dominos, you want in on either, both, or none?
He wants to pour butter pecan flavored coffee creamer on me and lick it off. I'm like, dude, gross. French Vanilla ok? Ugh.
I've never been so drunk at home. I just sat on the toilet playing with toilet paper for ten minutes, I almost made a paper crane.
Yeah come over whenever. Weed gets here at 8.
I'll be there at 7:59.
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