Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
he pointed at my clit and asked with a confused face, 'whats this thingy??"
I wonder if they've ever made a porno about the song "she'll be comin' round the mountain when she comes"
i'm high and 74% sure there's a monster in my closet
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made out with three guys on the first night of college orientation, just imagine what joys all of next year will hold
It's official, my little sister has hooked up with more girls than I have.
Nah, I'm just going to keep fucking him until he realizes we're perfect for each other.
We had 15 min before last call. Exact quote "let's see how drunk we can get."
I'm about to airblow my boyfriend. I'll three-way you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Of all the things that can be stripped of me i'll be damned if it's my vanity
I hope one day I make out with someone in a taco truck :(
I'm glad I inspire you to reach for the stars
Or a taco
Yea. I feel great. My life is great. My job isn't as shitty. And my daddy loves me. I love strip clubs. Great self esteem boost.
Dude, don't put me in a suit and feed me liquor; I'll never go home.
Turns out the bartender I fucked is the bar owner. WHY THE FUCK DO I PAY FOR HALF MY DRINKS? IS SEX NOT TIP ENOUGH?
so like
i may have gotten a little bit of blood in the charging port of my phone
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