I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
i don't even want to say how many boners i've caused this week
We asked an illegal alien to buy us beer. He didn't even want a tip. I'm going to Washington to plead that case.
Just mixed vicodin and mucinex. This cold just got fun.
Hahaha I asked him about her bjs and he said "I would not wish that on anyone"
I think I slept in the cheesecake last night. Either that or I had a wet dream. Whatever happened I need to wash my pants.
It's not slutty if it's for workout purposes...right?
Gina was bawling her eyes out and then she ran into the street and peed. she kept screaming "LOOK WHAT YOUVE DONE TO ME"
Yeah I don't even know dude. This shit has reached new levels of ridiculous. Let's hope baby Jesus gallops down a rainbow on a sparkling unicorn and wills that bitch clean. I think that's the best chance we've got.
As I read your response saying I need a tan before I can become a go-go dancer, a girl cane up to work and gave me 10 coupons for 100 days of tanning for a dollar.
This is fate. You were destined to be a stripper.
You very well can't change your mind now. It would upset the natural flow of life.
I mean, "boo" isn't the appropriate response to someone dying...
You did a body shot out of her belly button with a bendy straw.
If TJ is short for Trader Joe, I'm gonna fuck him
I just got a text from a guy. The python is ours if we want.
Only you could get too drunk for taco bell. I don't know if I'm jealous or ashamed. Go to bed.
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