no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
They just gave us root beer floats. I guess I won't quit my job today.
How do you have time to get laid so much in law school?
I like to set goals for myself. for example, he was my first libertarian
You refused to come over and kept yelling that you were gonna sleep on a car
So. Much. Sex. I feel like i ran a marathon then someone kicked me in the vagina. Soo worth it
every Thursday i draw one of my friends names out of a hat to choose who i will drunkenly text all weekend
I never should have let my cousin and his pregnant girlfriend move in with me. I'm never having sex again. They scare off men more than 'my dream wedding' pin board.
So I feel like I should have had a going away party for your dick. Complete with balloons and cake. Yeahh that's right. I'm gonna miss it.
I really shouldn't be this use to hearing "YOURE THAT GIRL?!?!"
Are you alive?
I woke up under the pier.
Nothing worse then being at the gym on the elliptical next to a guy looking at porn on his phone
Once you find out someone has a small dick, you never look at them the same again.
Sitting naked, eating lucky charms with rain boots on
So do I get points for screwing my recently single ex boyfriend and then telling him to go fight for his ex back?
Can you confirm that you aren't dead?
Randomize
