Looks like an M-80 went off in a lb. of pastrami
I just saw that your im name has '4eva' in it. Your man card has been revoked.
I wish scraping a resin bowl could be considered cleaning.
The sign in front of ihop says "designated drivers get half off their order"
I just saw a sign that said "STRIPPERS!!! As seen on Jerry Springer!". As if Springer is the highest honor. I'm pretty sure we're in south Georgia.
And as far as being fat goes I just did like 20 minutes of p90x and now i'm eating frosting out of the container....
Literally been drinking for 10 hours. Hammered. Roasted chestnuts fell out of my shirt earlier.
Just went through ex bf's and hook up buddys and liked pictures of them on facebook. A friendly reminder that I will be back in for the holidays
I don't know. I was also picked up by the doormen and held over the bar so I could do an upside down shot out of a bartenders tits.
And amler is totally snoring loud as fuck sitting on the steps with her feet in a puddle of soda puke
Everyone is out there getting real jobs and I just realized I've been "washing" my clothes with fabric softener for two months.
The highlight was when a stranger was nose to nose with you threatening to kick ur ass, and you said "Is that your real face? Stopped him dead.
I really don't know where my pants are, but that's not the problem. When are you going to unlock the door?
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
sorry for the late response. was in jail for 6 months.
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