well after we realized that his best friend and my twin sister were hooking up it was kind of an unsopken agreement that we would too
I'm going to buy you a pony but under one condition: you have to name it sarah jessika parker
My nipple rings set off the metal detector at the courthouse this morning.
you kept looking at stripers and saying " Go to College"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Don't worry about it. Anal sex isn't always sunshine and wildflowers.
He kept falling asleep with the pizza in his hand. I woke him up and told him and he was shocked because he thought he ate it all. Then he would end up falling asleep and we'd repeat the whole process again.
Its not college unless your study breaks were to go throw up from blacking out the night before
Is it malicious or apart of the healing process if I wipe my ass with his toothbrush?
You should have. Partying with 60 year olds and batman is so much better than partying with bitches our age.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I love you too! Remember NO alcohol or weed at my residence because of legal ramifications.
There is a guy in class using a wine bottle as a water bottle. Welcome to the Faculty of Environment.
He's only giving you free adderall so you can focus on his dick.
Don't take advice from me. I'm simultaneously shitting and eating cheesecake.
We were having sex but then he spanked me and i punched him but it was just a reflex i swear
He's my blizzard buddy. We're blowing lines and doing a 3D game of thrones puzzle
Randomize