before i could say "i'm not that kind of girl", i was.
office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
we used that portable toilet as a cooler to keep coronas. next person who tells me hospitals arn't fun needs to come party in rm 180.
Everytime I cough, my tampon falls out a little bit. Does this mean I'm loose?
It was like fucking a house. Down the chimney. That deep and empty.
I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
nothing like walking down the street with a garbage bag of puke trying to find a dumpster
We really need to stop competing to see who can get more drunk, and I REALLY need to stop winning.
i really appreciated the lovely drunk rendition of whitney houstan's "i wanna dance with somebody" you left on my voicemail.
They should incorporate dolphins into professional surfing
When you sleep in the bathroom, you're no longer a guest.
I licked your asshole in confidence.
He just made this face while he was fucking me and he looked like the hunchback of Notre Dame, I had to stop him.
You ever fart so hard it made you cum a little? A "friend of mine" wanted to know.
Randomize
