But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
I guess calling a coworker a lesbian sea cow is some kind of violation.
Going to eat lunch. Bunch of people in church clothes, and we are hungover, wearing pajamas, and in real danger of puking on the floor. We're about to destroy the ambience of this joint.
The heaters out again. Makin a fire in thebroke toilet for warmth.
haha she has always seemed a little off. when i met her i was told she was the queen slut. and she had a crown on at the time. it seemed appropriate.
This weekend has taught me that sometimes, being buried under a mattress is the safest place in the room.
I ended up in a bathroom giving my hymen a pep talk
Don't pretend you don't want to dance on the edge of overdose all three nights
We had sex on a lawn chair while fireworks were going off last night. It was unavoidable that I got mosquito bites all over my ass
It takes a special kind of Adderall to make me go to the hardware store, buy paint, and paint tiny polka-dots on all four of my bedroom walls.
I found you walking along the street hammered. You walked up said hi and handed me a beer.
returning from a 6am booty call in 2 feet of snow on a Tuesday is a bold new kind of low for me
Regardless of how one feels after a break up, whiskey must be consumed.
Damn victory sex feels great
I just typed "I've got a friend" and my phone autocompletes to "that's a dick appointment". What is my life.
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