So. Did i wake up at 430, try to drive home, stop to throw up at a shell, and try to clean out my car and drop my keys in a full dumpster? Yes.
Just got kicked out of the ocean for being "unsafe".
Fact: Godrick looks like David Archuleta
New drinking game watching teenage mutant ninja turtles movie and drinking every time raphael says damn, someone says april or ms oneil, and shredder appears And every time we see a mustache
well apperantly i passed out on the stairs shouting "victory".
i was enjoying my post acid trip trance a little too much. i found $50 on the sidewalk but didnt pick it up. just stared at the bill cuz it looked cool.
someone picked it up and i stared at the ground where it was for probably another minute or 2
Fuck I am so excited for the first time I can make someone call me Doctor Nikki during sex after I finish my PhD
...You tried to use your wallet to call her after you gave your cell phone to the cab driver as a "peace offering"
like I licked Molly off a boys palm last night at a bar I think its ok to eat chicken once a week
You know your life has gone downhill when someone has to preface your night with "don't get locked in a porta potty"
He has great stamina, he knows how to use his tongue, and he's hung like a goddamn Pegasus. I can overlook the man bun.
i just used a selfie stick to take an ass pic. i hate myself.
I'm laying in my bed in the fetal position with a bag of frozen peas on my head and the bathroom trashcan next to me. Fucking tequila.
Not to be hella graphic on main but I just came so hard I think I saw a new color.
operation Bang Australian Boy = oh so successful
Randomize