ahhh, you guys look like a cute little family in the cop car!
It was just pointed out to me in a meeting that there is a lipstick stain on my crotch.
Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
I think you're the first person to ever call Louisville, KY a "romantic getaway".
God. I'm so broke I don't even have a dollar to snort my adderall through.
I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
talk of her extensive whoreness has crossed oceans. thats impressive.
Sometimes you just need a break, and sometimes you also need to get stoned on these breaks. I sound like some kind of fucked up mr rogers when I say shit like that.
Kripsy Kremes at our place, bring your own coffee. And your own donuts because these ones are ours.
Would 7 layered rainbow jello shots entice you?
Any time you've had a failed relationship, I blast No Sex for Ben by The Rapture and dance around my room. I wish I was joking.
We're sitting in the bathtub, eating pizza, doing shots of vvodka and comparing nipples. I havfe never been so comfortable in my life.
I just had to explain to a 5 year old why I had fuzzy handcuffs hidden in a macaroni box under my bed.
Dude someone puked in a bowl n put it in the fridge. I thought it was salsa! Who does that?
What does it mean when the bartender gives you 4 straws?
Randomize
