have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
ew. I made a sandwich, and the cheese reminded me of her vagina
I always have to poop after I paint my nails. It never fails.
I have now hooked up with 8 of the Apostles. I have no idea where I'm going to find a guy named Bartholomew.
You're fucking beautiful as shit and we should have loving sex...
So apparently using the emergency exit of the bar as a bathroom is frowned upon in this establishment...
Senior week was like trying to herd cats. Very drunk cats.
If you end up wanting to sit on his face, just make a sound like a dying giraffe and I'll make myself scarce.
Last night was like blooper reel sex. He dropped me!!
Pretty sure the delivery guy saw me taking a shit this morning
easy for you to say. you're not the one who has to explain why you woke up with a pineapple and a used condom.
To describe how high he was he said, " I'm cocked out of my ape sandwich" so yes...that was some pretty good weed.
you asked if you could borrow my vagina for the night
drunkkkkk be here I heart you
you have 10 seconds to explain why the toilet is full of bread or its ALL GOING ON YOUR BED.
Randomize
