MIND BOGGLER: batman and jesus are the same person. Think about it.
Excuse me by sucking dick i am fighting crime. Just think of all the prostitues going out of business and getting real jobs.
This is so fucking sad. Netherlands isn't even a real country.
You asked my mom "who the fuck drives four hours to sleep in a guys bed and not touch his penis"
I've banged too many servicemen's wives to still be considered an American.
Were gonna hotbox in the trunk. I think there's room for another half of a person if you're interested
Omg 230 lb butch lesbian with a mustache grabbed my dick. I need an adult
It started out just like any other night: was watching a Zach Effron movie, drinking tequila out of a water bottle. I don't understand how this got out of hand.
I just recognized Courtney in a crowded Trader Joe's solely by seeing her ass. In other news, I survived the first round of layoffs today.
I'm not sure which feat is more impressive...
Just sharpening my eyeliner with a butterfly knife. You know. Typical weekday morning.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
I can't relate, I like my boobs roaming free like a wild animal, and I occasionally let them devour small children
we could do so many fantastic illegal things together. sexually and otherwise.
I'm going to make you a sign to put on your penis to ward others off
Yah. I'm gonna lay you down and feed you grapes, except I'm gonna replace grapes for my balls
Randomize
