Think I'm gonna go cougar hunting tonight... Any advice?
condoms and good judgment
Can I buy both of those at the same store?
hey dude i know youre in the next room but me and your sister need a condom, got any i could borrow?
I cut holes in my blanket and put my arms through it. It's the sleeveless "Bro Edition" Snuggie.
beer for lunch on the first day back to school.... too soon?
oh man. maybe i should puke on his dick? just to test how much he loves me?
the cop didnt laugh with me when he patted me down and pulled out my flask.
He got tattooed, peirced, and we're pretty sure he got rufeed by that fat chick. He was like a walking spring break stereotype.
Thank god the bicycalist i hit was on drugs
yea i really dont care about the sex, i just want him to eat my vag. He has to be good at because of his tremors.
I'm pretty sure this city writes new vice laws specifically because of us.
Final Summary: could he eat a lit sparkler? Probably. Could he do it while peeing off the roof? I'll tell you when you get to the ER.
he came during what was supposed to be the foreplay blowjob. there goes my evening.
My skirt was too short for the church and I brought my flask to the Scrooge play. God bless us, everyone!
For someone who wanted a break I'm getting way to much dick
I could have been on my second lucrative divorce by now, but nooooo, I had to be a strong independent woman.
Randomize
