If you want her to think you're a true humanitarian, you may want to stop referring to Hands Across America as "the Ghostbusters 2 of fund raisers."
I never said you were fat, just too fat for ME
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
This is the last pregnancy scare i've had since i was 12 and i thought you could get pregnant from masturbating.
I'm sorry I dragged a dildo (on a leash) into your room last night.
The polaroid of me taking a test-tube of Jegar out of the gay guys mouth pretty much explains my trip to Spain.
she's crying and begging for her chapstick and insisting on walking home...her every thursday ritual
did i try to light ur hair on fire with a sparkler at the club saturday?
There's never a time that i stay at this apartment that when i wake up in the morning and sit outside to smoke a cigarette that i don't feel ashamed of myself.
How exactly do I approach the whole "Well that was fun. Am I purchasing the Plan B or you?" topic?
He better not be in your backpack
I just want to make out with him forever
Yeah just pls explain the dishes and the dildo. I don't want to lose my job over a dick in the cooler.
This reminds me of the time you were crying and puking in the toilet at that party while i did shots of tequila in between blow drying your feet. miss you!
According to my bank account I spent a penny some where
Randomize
