i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
So for Valentine's Day...I finally swallowed. I feel like I earned that steak.
i like him when i'm sober AND when i'm drunk.i've been searching for this my whole life
We found her naked passed out on the bathroom floor. She didn't even make it to the shower. She was clutching the bathroom rug.
Also, just almost microwaved cereal. Thank god mom is here to stop me.
I will seriously deflate and melt into the floor into a puddle of devestation, shame and vodka.
Straight guys just can't stay away. My penis must have pheromones or something.
Nope, can't do it. It's a snowball effect. Today, leggings as pants. Tomorrow, female hitler. Natural progression.
am i new drunk or am i still drunk
He got the life proof phone case so he could jack off in the shower without his wife knowing
I'm not saying I'm planning to hook up tomorrow but I'm also not saying I'm unprepared for it
Your vagina is awesome, like it needs to teach a class for other vaginas
He doesn't understand the concept of a strip club. He keeps falling in love
Was cussing out our DD when one of the strippers takes him backstage. WTF
They call him magic hands is all I know.
Somethings are best left a mystery
I want to disappear from this job like a fart in the wind.💨
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