im ready to get crazy and take my wig off
I'm trying to bond with my sister... Its like getting to know a person I never met that I don't like
I love the "adulterer" look on you. It's hot.
Its part of my fall instant classic line.
We may have a problem that even dr. phil cant solve
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its like everytime i see you, my vagina gets a heartbeat.
He was sitting on the bathroom floor, swirling his finger in the toilet singing the Laguna Beach theme song. I don't know whether to laugh or help him.
Well I tried to steal a golf cart. I fought with the Chick-Fil-A cow. And other things.
don't be alarmed if you come back and i'm passed out drunk and naked cuddling with the franzia.
if I see a bottle of vodka right now I'll probably throw up gum I swallowed when I was a kid
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sweet. I'm actually coaching my work study into a 4-girl orgy so dinner was kinda important. Yes, I'm the best boss ever.
I raided the fridge drunk the same time dad was eating breakfast
Booty calls should never involve the cops.
He's two decades older than you. Remember how you said you wish you lived in the 70s? HE DID.
YOUR MANICOTTI IS FULL OF LIES
Sorry i meant to send that to my mom
I just wanna go home jackoff, eat chicken fingers, drink beer, play halo and go to bed. I'm sick of this shitty school, the shitty kids and having to fucking teach them.
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