But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
so that girl updated her facebook status as "had the worst night ever last night"
um, i could be wrong but i think it might've had something to do with mark drunkenly screaming about her unibrow right in front of her
okay so using the row boat as a giant snow sled probably wasn't the best idea.
we need a dd. For wednesday. At lunch. What are we doing with our lives?
succeeding
Nothing like a $37 iTunes bill. Jesus Christ do you know how many $2 beer/shot specials that is??? The answer is 16. 16 beer/shot specials.
I just made my roommate a 'Hope you don't have chlamydia' cake.
Make one for john too.
OH MY GOD I JUST WANT TO GO HOME AND FART ALL NIGHT.
I always thought The Big Bang Theory wasa terrible show but that was before it came with blowjobs and pizza.
He's sending me pics of Yellowstone scenery...the only thing I can think is "I would have sex next to that waterfall"
The only thing that got rode last night was the shit face train. I brought him home to see wht all the hype was about and he just started crying and puking in my bathroom.
I am going to MURDER whoever gave him my phone number but it was probably drunk me so I'm conflicted.
my poor anus
i feel as though me waking up and asking her if i went to the hospital was a sign that i was not okay
he's smothering me... and not in the good, can you move your thigh off my face please?.. way
I don't know which is weirder: that she was old enough to have a live-in son close to my age, or that the woman he was with was close to hers
Randomize
