Holy cold harsh reality of sobriety batman
I didn't talk to you tonight because I've decided you look like a man.
Watching the gap toothed girl get more ass than me is almost devastating.
The guy in the cast riped the tap off the keg and hit steve with it
explain the broken jalepenos in my underwear drawer?
He got violent drunk so we have to untie him in the morning. He's in your basement and you're out of electrical tape. Don't forget because I will.
I've shit my pants 4 times in 12 hours... Never trust a fart when u pass 30
put something nutritious in your body. AND NOT JUST THAT JOINT.
He came in two seconds and stole my pizza so I'm not counting it.
WAIT MOM THIS DOESNT NEED TO BE A FAMILY EVENT OK AARON DOESNT NEED TO BE AROUND FOR NIPPLEGATE 2014
He's far too busy staring into my soul to touch my tits.
I have chicken nuggets, lube and brand new batteries, he can stay at work charting all weekend for all I care, I'm set.
you asked how they got the microwave in the air. we had to explain three times that it was mounted there until you finally feel asleep
I seriously thought Satan had his hand up my asshole and was pulling out my soul. Never. Again.
Next time I think it’s a good idea to hook up with any of your wife’s family members or friends just kick me in my dick
Randomize
