your life is more of a joke than dina lohan.
if you\'re going to compare me please pick the classy one. Michael Lohan.
Don't let me forget to bring the toilet inside tonight.
I'm treating myself to a " uve slept with yet another mr. Wrong" breakfast
Hey, 'thunder cock' as proud as I am for you getting laid, could you put a muzzle on her? I have to be up at 5, thanks.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Freshman Move In Day, its like Christmas in August.
Dude, how the hell did you become an RA?
Is it hot in here? Is the room moving? Its moving. The room is moving. Its spinning like a top. Have you ever been covered in puke? What are you doing?
I will not fill you in on the details until we get back, so do not ask. I got peed on by the girl I was hooking up with last night.
Well THAT'S the last time I buy beer and baby wipes in the same Walmart run ... just wanted to shout I USE THEM TO REMOVE MY MAKEUP, YOU ASSHOLES
I don't know what was up he just kept sitting in his chair smoking weed and watching home movies all night it was weird as fuck.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So you told me to remind you that you vomited 3 times in the street because you would forget so here is your reminder
I guess I'm an especially affectionate person under the influence of tequila.
Literally breaking up to my boyfriend while jamming out to Feraglicious
I don't know what you slipped me, but my TV is vomming blood right now. Thanks, jerkoff.
fuck you
also please return my underwear, they were one of my favourite pairs xo
So unofficially, he told me he deleted tinder because of me. I think that's a pretty romantic gesture in 2018.
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