just peed in the tub, threw it on Megan.. she threw more back, I got out and threw toilet water on her.. forecast for tomorrow? pink eye.
Check if I'm alive tomorrow. If not, tell my parents I died happy and that there's a gay cheerleader in the spare bedroom
Any day that starts with a call from my ex-bf... crying... is a good day.
i guess i called my mom last night. she wasnt nearly as impressed with what we did in the bathroom as i was
needless to say, I hope she has to get an abortion again
Walk of Shame time yet?
Dude she's 6"2, blonde and on the cheerleading team. I look like Seth Rogen's fatter, unfunny brother. What shame am I supposed to be feeling?
the "its better than getting an actual virus from an actual porn star" argument failed.
Just found a ramen cup in the stall and all of the showers running with no one in them. WHERE ARE YOU?
other than the jail part I had a really good time with you
wine pong. its mother daughter day and i think she's mad. I smell like jager
Trust no bitch in laser tag. Not a single one.
Maybe I'm not hungover. Maybe I'm actually dying.
He is a sex God. It lasted more than an hour, and I don't remember how many times I came. I lost count at 57.
I need to show you how I feel about you by fucking you repeatedly.
My boss is paying me to come clean his house in a maid outfit and told me not to tell anyone....this is shady as fuck but I need the money
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