My milkshake brings 85 to 90 percent of the boys to the yard
It was like a spaceship landed and 1000s of hipsters filled up the park
It's not called being bisexual its called making out with anyone that has a mouth
I SWALLOWED her nuva ring. Please tell me how your night could have been worse.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We were confused who drove until we went outside and her cupholders were torn out of the dash and laying on the ground
you are not perverted enough for this relationship to work out.
exactly. I want him to have to live with the fact that he fucked me. I want him to look me in the eye and say "you were a drunken mistake".
I poured somre cereal, realized the chocolate to flake ratio was off, tried to fix it by digging through the box, gave up because of the difficulty level, and poured it back in the box. Being high is the best diet.
Somehow my drug dealer is stuck in my air-vent and now everything smells like patchouli, weed, deoderant and sweat.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just drove by a stop sign that had a used maxi pad stuck to it WHAT THE FUCK
I'm out of milk so I'm dunking my Oreos in Bailey's; this is my life now.
This is worse than naked and afraid. This is drunk and confused.
Just please don't close your legs while I'm down there again. I don't want my death to be labeled as "Head crushed while giving an individual cunnilingus".
YOU BETTER TOUCH MY NIPPLES TODAY
Since when do my one night stands start sending you friend requests?
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