yes we were fucking thats why i put "watching a movie" in quotations
You cheat on me once, shame on me. You cheat on me with a white girl, it's fucking over
It's getting increasingly easier to use his emotional instability to my advantage. That's about all he has going for him right now.
Doing lines of coke with a $100 dollar bill off a 6in x 9in photo of your childhood self really tells you where you where you've gotten in life.
i hope youre ready for a shit show because we just ordered a whole pitcher of red headed sluts
You had your dick do your apologizing for you last night. Apology accepted.
That's where the buck stops? Buying girlfriends online? THAT is where you draw the line?!
Dude imagine how many pictures of dicks Obama gets. That can't be unusual. Almost every kids in the US has written the president a letter.
Do drug dealers work on Memorial Day?
Abort mission; I repeat: Abort mission.I found an attractive one.
By cross-referencing our messages & her Twitter feed, I've deduced that she was eating spaghetti the whole time we were sexting.
Well that's what you get for messing around with her vagina. I told you it was a fickle and insatiable creature.
Being on probation is a nice change of pace. It's refreshing to wake up and know what I did last night.
My liver is screaming fuck you right now.
Adulthood is putting your bongs in the dishwasher because you're too lazy to clean them manually.
Are you ok dude?
Randomize
