i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
They should really pass out barf bags in church
so they made cookies with their faces printed on them...I ate jaime...she tasted like poop
Hemmingway ran to paris to avoid going to the university of illinois and becoming a doctor. It was there he developed a drinking problem. I need a plane ticket.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like she's the kind of girl who always ends up with guys who have oddly shaped dicks..
He kept singing "who's that peekin in my window" we thought he was high til we realized someone was lookin in the windows.
Hardly remember what he looks like and the man has seen me passed out spread eagle. I begin this journey with such a disadvantage.
shes on the ground doing bicycle kicks screaming "is my ass good enough for you now satan" send help
You know it's been a successful day when the only reason you put on a bra was to take off your shirt
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing like coaching 5 year olds with a bunch of visible bruises from last night's drunk bondage sex.
my night stand is a mini fridge, dont even try to get on my level of laziness.
You've been dating this guy for a month now and as your best friend I have to complain that I still don't how big his dick is.
alright well Taco Bell Closes at 12 so you better pray to god she's asleep by then or I'm running in your house butt ass naked with a bag of tacos
Annoying and petty is the name of the game and I'm the MVP.
breakfast this morning: omelette, Valium and baileys hot chocolate
Now that sounds like the breakfast of champions
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