Saying she let herself go implies she was actually holding on
nutella sex= disaster
When she can manipulate the direction of her leg hair, you know its time to leave
Guy in our group took down a chick in a wheelchair last night.
she was puking red wine out the car window, telling me about how shes joining weight watchers tomorrow, not okay.
I gave him head while he watched NASCAR. My future flashed before my eyes.
20 bottles of wine, 3 cases or beer, and 5 bottles in my kitchen... My parents are teasing me.
He just got dropped off drinking a flask, sitting on the handlebars of a chinese delivery man's bike
Tonight's gonna be epic. Did he bring my noodles?
It feels like you stuck your dick in a fire and then branded the inside of me.
The reign of the rally queen is over. Welcome to the age of the walking dead.
Hurry there's four guys dressed up as a bachelorette party, one has a condom veil and the rest are selling candy bouquets and asking if anyone wants to get laid for $5
I really dont wanna go to a traffic light party. I have nothing red to pretend I'm taken with. Without something red my "my girlfriend is away in the mines" story wont work.
I honestly don't think it will ever get topped. Unless a real female cop arrests me, then fucks me. That's it.
I am disappointed by everyone's lack of ability to dance on a stripper pole:(
I don't fucking know. He perched his parrot on his dick. I left after that.
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