: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
Dude I got a text from you at 1:30 last night and you didn't use any vowels
Haha, I didn't want to buy any... we're in a recession you know
Dude, this old lady messaged me on Facebook talking about her grandson and wanted to know shit about me. I'd almost call her a cougar except she looks like mashed potatoes that have come alive.
He was so drunk that he tried to backflip off a baby chair.. How do you think that ended?
I'm 90% sure a girl here is wearing a bra strap as a headband.
is it still called a breakup if its your friends boyfriend that you have stopped sleeping with?
Somehow she slept thru the vacuuming, people walking in and out, and the sound of constant beer bottles hitting the trash, but when someone said weed in a regular volume of voice she startled awake.
I had to run home with my hands covering my tits this morning. How does this keep happening?
I was desperate and wasn't about to let my cereal get soggy so I ate it on the toilet. Don't let me repeat last night.
so apparantly i made out with 24 santas last night...and an elf...and a stoner
I love you. I would never turn you into a bear.
We're like a married couple, but we only have sex on college holidays and other people's birthdays.
Why is there a trampoline for sale in my front yard?
But I think I successfully seduced her with my alias.
Idk I just think that seeing that man's Twitter always resulting in me looking for the whiskey is a bad sign
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