but it happened after you broke up with me and before we made up.
Swine flu is the new snow day.
I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
when did we get so old that our friends started having LEGITIMATE children?
i convinced her that her period would come back if we did it doggy style
The Masters... another excuse to excessivly start drinking by 1
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
Threw a lawn chair at the neighboors dog. I think I killed him. Come here and assess this
I was preparing to do my walk of shame shirtless, but then I found my sweater, wallet and keys neatly piled under a tree in the park.
Woke up today to the sound of church bells. My first thought was shit the apocalypse, but then I remembered my hook up lives next to a church. This might be a rough day.
You had me at "mimosas" several texts ago.
I'm trying to pinpoint the moment when "don't do anything I wouldn't do" became bad advise.
If I hid at school to avoid the cops, is it fleeing and evading or just being a good student?
I'm drunk in a place called Lick-A-Chick. PS. It's not a lesbian hot spot, they sell chicken.
Fair warning birthday party last night avoid kitchen & upstairs bathroom if you value your remaining sanity
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