when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
she must of just birthed a child cause her labia touched the floor
I don't know at least half of his name. I have officially become a statistic.
I just sat through a State Farm mortgage Insurance commercial to watch a Trick Daddy video. Is this the target audience they are going for here?
She was surprised when she saw all our living room furniture was made from old kegs. It's like she's never met us before...
found glitter on my cock. thank you for bringing me to that dance recital.
Getting my nails done with Diana... I'm going for the keep your friends close and the girl who's dating the guy you want to fuck closer
The fuck-me-pumps were hot, the XL hoody kinda ruined it.
Liquor doesn't fix sad, but it sure as hell lowers my standards for a rebound.
Well we had to pull over on a side street in town so I could throw up while moms were driving by with car loads of kids, I feel like I just performed a lil silent AA film for the childrens
In the liquor store when a straight girl and a gay guy were just arguing about who hooked up with the same guy first.
We had sex to Hey Arnold, Rugrats, and All That. I feel like my life has come full circle.
did i get sucker punched in the face last night or was our make-out session just that intense?
he came with me to get plan b but they didn't have any. when I started crying he said "come on it's not that bad.. ill go get sandwiches from the vending machine and we'll have our first meal together as a family"
He thought reverse cowgirl meant he dressed up as a cowgirl. Honestly, it was more creepy than funny
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