I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
What's the name of that girl you hooked up with? The one that looks like the fire hose sign.
Just saw someone buying TWO six packs of O'Doul's. WHY ??
That sucks. I just talked to a telemarketer for 15 minutes about CSI: Miami and weed.
I found him with a guitar and his kitten in his room. He was singing a song he'd titled "you're a cat". Guess what most of the lyrics were...
So I'm drinking wine and watching Thumbelina
I'm teaching my cat to play fetch
Yep, it's a friday
We didnt even know he was in the house until he came downstairs and asked why he was wet
I'm wearing a real bra and real shoes. I look like a fucking lady.
I tried to force my roommate into a sink last night. And I almost won.
It's the happiest looking penis I've ever seen. It should have a top hat and a spectacle on and soft shoe across the room with a cane. He's a cheery little feller.
You slapped the bar and yelled "daddys thirsty!" at the lady behind the bar
To be fair I was thirsty
When she told you not to yell you looked directly at me and screamed "Man, she sucks!"
Looks like a sea otter shaved my vagina. Keep an eye out for me this weekend, no one can see this.
Someone signed my nipple.
He was a Cher impersonator. They are the draggest of queens
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