Revelation of the day. Bulimia is dumb. Anorexia is easier.
You suck.
She thought I was gay, so I told her I'd be more comfortable with anal. She agreed.
im in Michaels with rachel and i see a little boy jumping around and waving a rainbow pompom. Welcome to our team little one
Her underwear doesnt even match. If youre going to be a face book whore at least have matching shit.
I found a wheel chair. there is now a high chance im going to be fired from this job
She fucking ripped my chandelier out of my ceiling. How does that make her a keeper?
I hope the dean has a raincoat on because I'm prolly gonna throw up on him when I get my degree
DO NOT GO IN OUR BATHROOM. it cannot be unseen
the good news is that i vommed the last of my humanity last night.
welcome to the club.
The album on my phone containing gross pictures to send when boys ask for nudes is now substantially larger than my normal photo album. Because I send one every night
So, in keeping with the last two years, are we going to watch the new Hobbit movie on acid again? It's kinda starting to feel like a Christmas tradition.
you called me drunk last night to talk about summoning sex demons with magic WTF
I spent two entire hours explaining to a guy why I wouldn't make out with him. How was your night?
It's such a sad loss when a hot guy finds Jesus and grows a neckbeard
He walked into the bar with a pillow and put his head down...nuff said
Randomize
