Do u have any bacon or vodka by chance
Bring mistletoe to the strip club, and they feel obligated. they dont even charge you
Were taking his cast off tonite. Need a saw and a gameplan. Meet us at rosies in 30.
i'm surprised you didn't wake up. like i literally came when he was fingering me as i was spooning with you and all you did was mumble "that's a good idea, mom" and pull the sheets away from me.
Eberyones makin fun of me cuz I found a snail and caught him and put him in a bocks for u
Atty had lunch with DA and confirmed I am not the target of the investigation. No word on anything else
EVERYONE IS SPEAKING SPANISH. I ONLY KNOW HOLA.
I sent him a pic of my tits and he said "Word." I need a drink.
Your mother liked my album on facebook that's only filled with drunk pictures. I don't know what to feel about this
is that a sigh of girlish delight, or "sigh...I'm having a herpes outbreak'
Can't it be both?
Update: they told me I was twerking to twenty one pilots
Why would you call when you knew I'd be having sex!?
Why would you answer?
I'm currently drunk proofing my room
Puking out the window is really hard when you're the one driving.
Dude she is fucking shit up. Her baby would be proud
Randomize
