I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
im pretty sure there are laws against slapping prostitutes
i'm pretty sure there are laws against prostitutes.
beer pong: waldo and ernie vs. bacon and eggs... i love halloween
My mom seriously just told me my insurance company pays for rehab. In an email. I expect a real, not just us joking, intervention coming on. I'm not accepting a "lunch date" with that bitch.
He refused my I'm sry gift of ANAL. That's how angry he was.
the realtor just took us to a house I had a one night stand in. I feel like it's a sign.
Can u please come get me. My car keys are gone. Somehow I ended up sleeping in my trunk
My picture of a beer can in a McDonalds cup full of ice got more likes than my relationship with her. Is beer THAT much better than monogamy?
New BDSM fun fact. When you get spanked hard enough with a flat object, you get welts. Welcome to thunderdome, bitches.
That's like.....u just dangled a sex carrot in front of me then took it away!
we were making out in my truck and while she was straddling me she informs me that she jerks off horses for a living. Should I be concerned or flattered?
I just swiped right for a guy on Tinder solely because it looked like he was holding Zoboomafoo
I complemented his smile, he sends me a dick pic. Seriously?
Then you guys just all showered together...?
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