just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
I don't care where my tongue is but i t's going to be in all the pictures.
People were autographing me. I'm like the spring break yearbook
Have you ever made a sandwich from swedish fish and tortilla chips?
Get out here. Doing shots with the delivery guy. Also, the food is here
and yes i will spend 10 dollars on a vibrating toothbrush to masturbate but not a calculator for my test
Wanna hang out, and by hang out I mean go get plan B... and maybe lunch, but mostly plan b
DOWN HORMONES. BACK.
I passed out with my wizard stick taped to my hands and got woken up being poked with a St. Bernard
well, I yelled "the tribe has spoken!" at a boatload of people and then I walked home alone in the pouring rain at 1:30am. karma really is a bitch, yo.
They need 20 oz Capri suns with liquor. Douches need to grow up with their clients
If we all have the time, and the weather permits, and you have no plans, we should have another go at Operation Get Our Carless Friends Laid. All the lonely people will be out. We can take our lonely people out too.
I think I may be going on too many job interviews. I've started to bring up Shonda Rhimes in my interview answers.
She threw her burger out the car window last night. My vegan neighbors were not pleased but I’m pretty sure I saw a for sale sign go up on their lawn so I owe her one.
Our conversation went from you choking me to my quarter life crisis reeeaaalllll quick.
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