so i did it. i barked while i was ejaculating. not a word was said by either of us afterwards.
so how much did i say i owed you?
$5 and a new fuck buddy.
im pretty sure that there was a mint leaf in my poop this morning. i love mojito season.
and she's shaped like a lego person so that's not happening
Have you ever been so weak from sleep you couldn't push your poo out?
Apparently married women at the office don't like getting congratulated on getting "knocked up"
then they high fived as they party boyed me. I was a policewoman sandwhich. I love you halloween.
WHOA. WHOA. WTF. WHOA. TOO HIGH FOR HIM TO BE ENGAGED RIGHT NOW.
How did I end up in the pool?!
Welcome to ASU
and then she started to quack like a duck and u started throwing bread at her
Technically he's married but he says it's "not like that" even tho his wife lives with him. Not sure if I believe him but I'm sleeping with him anyway.
OMG. Dad just threw a 100 dollar bill down on the table for a girl to lift her shirt. I think he was kidding, but...
Well I can't be held accountable to know every which time you slid a finger here or slid a finger there. I'm way too busy getting close to climaxing to document these things.
He’s really fucking cute. Like, I want his penis in my mouth cute.
The lady in the stall next to me just screamed "why are you so hairy!?" and "why can't you get any!?" to her vagina. WTF
I am NOT losing my v-card to a guy who doesn't know my ass from my elbow.
Randomize
