just took a sink shower in Arbys bathroom
Thats about the time I should have known you would run around naked and try to make out with my sleeping mother
its like national bring your ginger to the pool day or something
He took the lighter and said "this is how I give myself a bikini wax."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's a lightpost hitting you in the head. Of course it's going to hurt the day after.
I DON'T WANT TO DEMONSTRATE MY DICK TAKING ABILITIES WITH MY MOM THERE.
I was drunk for 3 days straight...well wasted for 3 days with periods of "just drunk" inbetween
And one night I got way too drunk and thought he said call me a polish name so I called him Konrad. Now he thinks I cheated on him with a Konrad.
That's my new pick up line call me a polish name
After I came she just held my balls until I fell asleep. It was like adult swaddling. Magical...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well I'm going to hell. But I'm going after multiple orgasms.
Considering we're about to fuck, I really need your girlfriend to stop liking all my Facebook posts.
I can't believe I got dumped for a fat chick, but at least I got four and a half years worth of free shit. So we can call it even.
I'm bringing home frosties. I need to talk about butt stuff.
Leaves on the ground. Coffee in one hand and your man in my other. Lovely fall morning.
the girl next to me was drawing sonic the hedgehog on her exam what the fuck
godspeed
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