There's a 34yo winking at me. Why do i find this weird when my bf is a 38yo married man?
could you grab mr moo while you're at his apt?
you brought your stuffed animal to a booty call?
thanks for not screaming that I'm pregnant when that guy was giving me his number.
You should have been there to see the look on her face when I told her that my dog gives better head than her. It was a beautiful symphony of shock, anger, and disbelief.
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To say he's a good fuck is like saying the beatles had a bit of success. My vag is still mourning the fact he moved.
she looks like she scalped a horse for her weave
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
just woke up in a camero on the way to nebraska, i would appreciate it if you answered your phone.
So what's going on?
We hit boys town to get stupid. I mean invading Iraq stupid.
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I'm up in my room and I just saw a naked guy sprint out into the streets from my mom's party downstairs
I'm not sure when I will get off this toilet at work but it's not looking promising
I'm worried about your health. And your boobs. Actually, health, then boobs. Health first, boobs second. And third.
I made him dinner in just his cowboy hat and my boots after we did it...you should see his face :)
Someone signed my nipple.
Hypothetical question: Would it be wrong to tell the annoying children who don't listen to their parents that the motel is haunted?
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