wouldn't it be funny if when girls shaved their vaginas, they gave them sideburns?
i caught a guy at work today stealing condoms. i let him go when i realized that they were extra small.
What do ugly girls do when they get too drunk at parties. They can't pull the whole "sorry i passed out on your couch but i'm hot so it doesn't matter "card
i just know my balls have never hurt this bad before
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Nothing like all your friends getting engaged to remind you how much fun sleeping around is.
If I remember who won the superbowl tomorrow morning.. I think I'm just going to quit drinking. There really won't be a point anymore
I found her in the bathroom licking her screwdriver off the floor. she said there was no way she was wasting a $6 drink.
It's tough not drinking when the bartender adds rum to your coke without telling you, and doesn't charge you
She came so hard that after she finished, she started a slow clap and then told me she pulled a muscle.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
oh. oh my god. i just had lunch with my mom with semen still on my face.
I'm just wondering how Jon managed to get vomit ON THE CEILING?
I woke up at 6 and was laying at the top of my stairs.
Just seriously saw this chick say, watch this motherfuckers then did a 42 sec keg stand.
You at least asked for her number right?
I would cock slap so many things if I had a cock.
If you wear a peguin suit you MUST send me a picture!!!
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