she gave up head for lent, but she said sex was still fair game
then you put baby powder on the bottom of your feet and walked to your room so "ladies would follow the footprints"
She's in the middle of blacking out but is singing Mariah carey songs. Hitting every note.
if I want to go home with a foreign boy, please feel free to let me go, sober me gives you permission to let drunken me do it
All I kmoe is rheres a coffee pot full pf vodka in my purse
Yes I have a handle on life. A handle of Svedka.
hooked up with the gay kid & his friend's mom told me "you know he has a identical twin brother whose straight, right?"
once again, we need to groom him to be a better human being. using liquor and tits.
Bonus points if the penis has a little hat too
You're not supposed to support this behaviour, btw the judge recognized me
We shot off some fireworks at 12 and then I orchestrated the group singing of god bless the USA all while wearing a don't tread on me flag as a cape. I repped hard.
I mean, on what planet are nipples suppose to look like that?
We can only continue to use the "oh what's the difference between circumcised and uncircumcised" for a few more months before people will see through our lies
And don't worry, I have a great track record of rallying after a casual midday blackout.
Hey, what's the French word for when you meet your boyfriend's friend and you have that gut feeling that you smoked pot naked in a hot tub with him at a house party years ago?
Randomize
