Spaghetti and Car Bombs, good idea or what will end up on the bar in a few minutes?
my secret santa just gave me a pregency test
do you know what's more awkward than a positive pregnancy in a public bathroom?
not a thing
walking in on a stranger's positive pregnancy test in a public bathroom
I will never underestimate my ability to drunken ramble. At one point last night i think i was talking about hieroglyphics
i wish there was a photo editing effect that fully opened my drunk eyes
Just bought myself a coach diaper bag. I thought it would be perfect for school. the baby bottle holders are where i'm gonna put my booze
Things got a little weird when he fired up his homemade flamethrower in the living room.
I try to help out whenever I can. Speaking of rough nights I woke up half naked on Brady's couch with bloody paper towels duct taped to my foot.
was it you or me who tried to make the, what appears to be, nacho cake in the oven?
This morning my mouth tasted like fruit trees, battery acid, and magnums. Transferring schools was the best decision Ive ever made.
All I know is she walked in crying with a bag of limes and a bottle of tequila and has been locked in her room blasting lil wayne ever since.
So my quick shower turned into a "lay in the shower and let the hot water reign over you because you are too hungover to wash your hair" shower. I'll be there closer to 1:30!
The groom's brother was an accomplishment. Then I remembered he was also the officiant. Check and check.
I think he's only dating me for my ass...
you're welcome to come here, except my beds from ikea so it's more unstable than i am
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