do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
hey, can i borrow that thing you never use?
what?
your penis
I'm at a party with that guy you made out with on new years. He remembers your name!
i told them to call me paula dean as i was making all 10 for $10 boxes of pizza rolls in the microwave
just tried googling 24 hr taco bell and when i typed "24 hour" it autocompleted with fitness. buzzzz killllll
Can you explain to me later why there's a pirate hat in my bathtub
And I'm ok with his balls touching my ass
the thought 'we cant do it, we're in a public place' crossed my mind, and then I realized he's succeeding if he's trying to domesticate me.
elevator sex. pronto.
nope, if she's going to skank it up with ginge-a-saurus douche she deserves the silent treatment.
This girl just swallowed a pealed banana whole. I'm not worthy.
I know. But whatever I'll just eat cold pizza and play with my cats by candlelight
Well you were already wet from trying to drink straight from the faucet, so I just put you in the bathtub with a pillow and called it a night
Just cried watching Wimbledon, worst comedown ever.
When the state fair security guard came to yell at her for having outside food and drink she threatened to kick him if he tried to stop her and then she proceeded to chug the whole bottle.
classic
I'm torn between regretting everything and regretting nothing.
Randomize
