My secretary told me she wishes she can have an affair with someone in the office (she's separated from her cheating husband)...Umm...Okaaay
why does he think he needs to feed/take me out to get some ass? we are at a bar wasting my fucking time
Watching a deaf couple have an argument in the mall. Can't bring myself to look away.
I just watched 2 blind guys walk into each other head on in providence. It pays to pregame in your car.
New major. Tourism Management. I dont know what it is but it sounds like something all the stupid slutty failed business management majors do.
thank you for tagging me in all my pictures as "skank" and yourself as "made by the hands of God"
Just stabbed myself in the face trying to lick melted cheese off a kitchen knife.
Cause a man that looks THAT good must have an ass that tastes like lucky charms
He tried to convince me that it wasn't really that small and all he had to do was pull back the groin fat. It was still small.
Drinking Patron always ends with me puking or receiving anal. So make your move when I start ordering it.
Blowing a married man is so much more important than a 12 year olds basketball game.
He was super adorable, like I wanna pinch his cheeks while I fuck him...
He fed me jello shota while i was sitting on the toilet and then he peed in the shower
Dick is the cure to depression. I'm almost positive. And cough syrup.
I'm hammerd and his penis is still the size of a giraffe's neck
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