Eric said he heard us having sex the other night. He said i did a great job.
There's just this way he looks at me that makes me want to suck his soul out through his dick.
He was like an evil genius with the clitoris. I don't stand a chance.
I woke up with a crunchy, pink Pepto streak through my hair, no recollection of the last 6 hours of my night and the feeling that all the hotel's staff knew me on a first name basis.
so i gave him head in the movie theater last night. thought we were alone til I heard the clapping from the other side of the theater after he'd finished.
apparently my insurance doesn't cover road head. Bummer.
wanna go with us to feed the ducks bread soaked in vodka?
how could i say no?
When you started Hi-fiving people I knew u were fucking gone. You slapped some dude on the shoulder when he wouldn't hi-five you and he asked if he even knew you
it's my sixth sense. If there's an orgy within 20 miles of me i'll know about if. Or be a part of it.
Both his mom and his sister were hitting on me when I stopped by today. He isn't a real friend anyway, right?
This is love.
Which part? The alcoholic cupcakes or the lesbian st paddys day party?
I wish I had a picture of me and ron helping that stripper lick her own vagina
Dude. I don't even want cuddles. I just want an acknowledgement that I just had balls in my mouth.
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
Totally reading about penis envy for my final exam
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