READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
i feel like im doing the pre-walk of shame..like every car that drives by is like, ooooo look at that girl, in that itty bitty dress, yep shes about to get her skank on tonight...
from all the glitter we used it actually looked like a disco stick
yea i thought the egg drop soup tasted weirdly like cum, and then i suddenly remembered what happened last night.
i'm never eating chinese again.
He brought Stephanie home from the black light party. Apparently he has night vision beer goggles
it was either a really good one night stand or a really really good first date. thank you online dating
I guess birthday shots aren't always the answer
Cookies. Watch out fir falling satellites.
She said I'm so hungry I could eat a dick and winked at me
I ripped my favorite jeans crossing that fence
That sucks
It's an upgrade! I didn;t even have to unzip my pants to pee!
I LOVE YOU NO MATTER HOW MANY BALLS YOUVE SUCKED
Day drinking! Today! (tomorrow too!) Our place! Whenever you get off work! Ready go!
I was trying to drink every time they said planned parenthood but my body isn't cut out for this.
I never thought I could be this turned on by a man wearing racoon tails.
snapping my married booty call and next thing I know a plan b ad pops up
Randomize
