dude im shwasted, kabul is not the best place for this
To think... Somewhere, too drunk by buckcherry is someone's theme song
Who would have sex with her? She looks like she shops at baby gap
i was in the bathroom puking my brains out, a girl walked in and said "i just came to do the same thing" so i told her i would move over and share the toilet. its better than being alone.
just passed out again, this time at a subway. On a positive not they gave me a free sandwich, pretty sure out pity but at this point i don't care
dude. i just ate tomato soup with a funnel. we're out of spoon-straws.
You peed in my camelbak and said it was a reverse catheter. Not cool.
We just did a shot to "getting laid in the bar bathroom". I love where this thursday is headed
I gotta figure out which 7 tampons in the box contains the drugs
Doing 9 month old dishes in my bath tub. These dishes literally had enough time to gestate a human child
Almost caused a huge accident on the highway because I was distracted by how orange the road barrels were
I based a lot of our friendship on the fact that I thought you were crying from feeling so sad for me when I got crabs. I'm not sure if we can ever be as close now.
Bjs and tacos. That's my life.
What happened?
New Orleans
Every time
I wanted to make my beer stronger so I poured vodka in it. Why god....why
Randomize
