I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
i wish exes would disappear into a world where we never have to deal with them again, and they can just create drama for each other. Then if they wanted to talk to us, they would have to apply to get a "visa" to come back to our world.
I would pay so much money for a video of you fucking a sheep
No, i'm not gonna let you give me a footjob on the floor of the cheesecake factory. C'mon.
i have a $600 bill for my ER visit in which they did nothing but suggest to me that i am an alcoholic.
even your uterus rejects him.
apparently my uterus is the smartest part of my body.
Part of my whole not being a slut anymore involves not giving other peoples boyfriends blowjobs
I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE.
good it was pretty cute, also what would bong water do to a puppy?
He almost got to me tonight but then I was like fuck it I'm going to dance with a teli-tubby on the bar so fuck you
NO SHITSVILLE I just saw a homeless dude punch a pigeon that flew by him
You peed on a pole and declared to a cop that it was your pole and yelled at him to not even look at it, and then yelled at all of us for looking at it.
My sister's exploding appendix just cock blocked me...
my grocery cart consisted of hershey bars, sour patch kids, starbursts, mayo, 4 frozen pizzas, 4 lunchables, and chips. clearly, i can't do this on my own.
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