I forgot to tell you. I'm at a porno shoot today.
WORST DINGLEBERRY EVER
ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
the non-midget kid sent 8,000 texts in a month. the midget parents are pissed. THIS IS EPIC WHEN YOUR HIGH.
mom found the triscuts in her underwear drawer, its done.
his blanket is still in the back seat of my car, its like a constant reminder of his small penis
There is no way that a naked man in your kitchen can be explained-away as a "misunderstanding."
You went down on Rachel in front me last night. Worst. Brother. Ever.
Wors thing about having a cop dad: random drug testing
you know that feeling on acid where you think the world stops just to fuck with you? That's what it felt like.
Ways to ruin a one night stand: the guy finds your parenting magazine on your dorm room desk.
You tried to wave to Meg on Family Guy and got upset because she wasn't waving back
Just FYI....you totally yelled out Royals while we were having sex last night lol.
A boy just offered to come over and help me clean my house. I hope you are more successful than he will be tonight.
I went to BBQ fest on Wednesday and came home wearing a different shirt, so I think I did some good damage.
Randomize
