i think the world will end when pigs can fly. think about it, everyone says blah blah when pigs fly. so shit would be going down if they ever can.
oh fuck your right
he was CRYING into my vagina
you could never motorboat her...you'd have to motor-titanic her
He just walked in our room casually and said "big girls are hungry"
mom brought her knitting needles with her. its bad enough to be in the ER on new years, but to be with the knitting parent!?
Im cutting you off tonight ONE boy at a time
its not that I hate him, it's just that I wish his penis was attached to someone i like more
He fell on top of me at a party. I slept with him a week later. We've been fucking for 2 moths. Most successful relationship ever.
Apparently after I threw up I put my socks in the toilet......
Hey nothing wrong with those! I can't believe the guys who let me see where they live on first dates. Even more surprising, I don't stalk them after they've done me wrong.
He also complimented my butt. High praise coming from a boob guy.
I'm glad there seems to be a general consensus regarding your ass
She just started crying. With my dick still inside her. Something about her grandpa.
I just want to smoke weed and be the little spoon all winter. My modern day hibernation.
How do you know i dont look like i got attacked by a weedwacker on bath salts?
you were on a whole other level. you went home with him because he said "you got some light ass eyes"
Randomize
