I just woke up under a kitchen table with my sandals taped to my feet and a corona bottle taped to my hand..
We're 3 acts into this drag show and we've already run out of Lady Gaga songs.
Have you ever straight up just taken a bite out of a block of cheese? Because it's amazing.
I don't care how old I am, if it's your 21st birthday I'm going to make out with you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Someone tried to flush pizza down the toilet. Well, at least tried to
Dude, fuck the siberian warm up. You can't put vodka in hot chocolate. Learn from my mistakes
They broke our car window and then wrote "great night" on the next
pretend your vagina is a choco taco and the guy is someone who really loves choco tacos. let him enjoy the choco taco.
You were outside cuddling a rock singing Bohemian Rhapsody.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up this morning and the lid to the back of my toilet was missing. Dahfaq do I do with this shit?
i just remember sliding through the snow and yelling i love america before puking on the oncoming cars
I need rollerblades now
Rollerblades pick up bitches
We thought it was a good idea to send a picture to our HS science teacher where she's smoking a joint and I'm holding a monkey, and he invited us to lunch. NEW LEVEL UNLOCKED.
I can't. I'm not drunk enough for this information.
Pooping with Eye of the Tiger playing. Not a single fuck shall be given.
I just got a rock from a customer. Weirdest. Tip. Ever.
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