I may be a little high but I'm pretty sure my alphabet soup has only Os in it
We call that spaghetti Os
halloween is SO much better on drugs, why didn't anyone let us know about this when we were kids
Also, never say you're cool with a threesome if they ask. That shit's a trap.
Aaaaand I just watched him face plant in front of the taxi. This is why we don't invite him to margarita night.
I'd say I'd distract him, but I lose my psychic powers when guys get girlfriends. And by psychic powers I mean taking off my top.
I was gonna tell her, but there were too many tongues in my mouth
I am currently watching him baptize himself in a baby pool with a handle of belvedere while wearing a coral dress.
I want to have sex with him.
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
And it's settled. 10 months is the appropriate amount of time before having the dick pic discussion.
I only know one person in my class and that's my dealer.
I just took a plan B pill with my preworkout. That's the level I'm on today.
The last time I saw you, you were giving the stripper a lap dance.
My hook-up from last week somehow found me at the club, saw the girl I was trying to fuck, kissed me right in front of her, and walked off.
Just made a drug contact standing in the sandwich line in the dining hall. Is this real life?
You're my fucking hero.
You can help me! We'll make an occasion of it. Have some rum, make some smores, condemn the email system to the pits of hell...
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