the recession has oofficially hit my standards.
ok think of it like jelly beans. if you can learn to like the licorice ones, youll always have lots of them because no one else wants them. its the same with fat chicks
i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
I don't know what's more sad having a rewards account at a liquor store or already racking up 273 dollar points since january
His apartment number was 69. I had to.
She gave him a lap dance on the glass table. You can guess how that ended
These margaritas aren't just going to regret themselves.
We are stranded. Come find us. Bring an egg
I WISH WE COULD PLAY THE DRINKING GAME TOGETHER AND THEN BANG FOR AMERICA.
I'm at the level of despair that only Panda Express can fix
Then while I was crying on his shoulder, he got a boner. Soo. I kinda just hopped on.
YOU CAN'T GET A TATTOO BECAUSE OF KPOP FANFICTION. THAT'S NOT HOW LIFE WORKS
And thank god for autocorrect cuz I can't even think in English let alone spell in it right now.
Can we start referring to attractive men as "A fine piece of dick?"
Pray for me.. I'm like the lonely vagina in a sea of sworming dicks
Randomize
