On a scale of affliction to ed hardy, how douchy is in there right now?
im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
What time do you think the pilgrims started drinking? I want to be as accurate as possible.
He looked at me and said "Last call" before putting his penis away into his boxers
Family bonfire. I just discovered my cousin drank an entire bottle of champagne at the age of 7. I just got showed up.
Was this before or after he told that homeless man outside the bar about his past sexual experiences?
somehow attending a funeral viewing turned into me snorting cocaine in the bathroom and drawing ninja turtles for children
My life is a video game called get the drunk princess back to her castle, thank you to all that participated
his first fb message to me in 3 years was "is your cock open for business?" im blocking him
have no fear, swaggie olivia is here to bring glorious gifts and horse dick to children
The last time the Patriots won the Super Bowl I lost my virginity. I can only imagine what'll happen if they win this year.
Omg my orgasm just made the fucking sun come out. Clearly my libido controls the weather now.
So I got cockblocked by our relationship status last night
No he doesn’t answer my texts except for like on New Year’s Because like I was fucked up on New Year’s and he said happy new year and I told him the same and I called him dragonslayer and you can’t really recover from that
Randomize
